I write to you from Far Leaves Tea, a Japanese teahouse on the edge of Berkeley and Oakland. There is a very calm and warm energy here, from the lighting to the wi-fi password: Be Here Now. Outside it’s the first rainy day since I arrived last Thursday night, not ideal for Halloween but nice all the same.
A couple hours ago I packed up all my things at my friend Lizzy’s apartment in the Mission District and took Marcos to the BART station, sending him on his way back to Minneapolis. Now that I think of it, I have never spent so much time with one person…maybe ever. For the entire month of October, we traveled, ate, worked, played, and rested together. We took on some of each other’s mannerisms, taught each other tons, had running jokes that only made sense to us, drove each other a little crazy at times, and bonded deeply. Our film project became a little world of its own, a field vibrating around us as we journeyed, dancing with so many creatures along the way. Now we each take it with us into our individual lives, collaborating on the editing process from across the country.
When I left Minneapolis, I imagined that when this day came I would continue up to Chico, CA and Ashland, OR, visiting friends and seeing if Ashland is a place I could call home. As fun as it was to travel with a partner, I also love traveling alone and being with myself so intensely through the ups and downs. I love the freedom of flowing where I’m led. Now that I’m here in the Bay, however…I’m playing with the idea of landing. I have two job interviews next week that I’m excited about, both in Berkeley. Two or three days in Berkeley in January were enough to make me feel at home here. It’s been fantastic staying with my friend Lizzy this past week. Now I feel a pull to the East Bay, away from the chaos of the city.
With the constant flux of traveling, holidays seem to pop up out of context. How is it Halloween??? And not snowing?! Preposterous. I don’t have a costume yet, nor do I have definite plans. I’m here in the East Bay to celebrate Shabbat and “Challahween” at Urban Adamah, a Jewish farm. After that I may meet up with a friend I met in Arizona last March at a Shamanic Herbalism retreat, a sister I knew I’d see again before long. She’s just moved to Oakland! Another reason to stay…
My parking meter is about to expire, so I’ll keep it short and relatively plot-oriented for now. I’d love to spend a week or more relaxing, reflecting, flowing and opening the gates for a flood of creative expression. I’ll say it once more: there is so much I want to share! For now, I give thanks for an incredible journey and the beauty of coming to closure on the first stage of a dream. I remind myself to take a deep breath, lift my palms and surrender to what I’m being shown. Nearly a month ago, the image of G!d as a soft earthen path came to me during Yom Kippur services in Boulder. Now more than ever, I intend to continue on that path. Distractions and distortions glitter along the way. As often as I can, I choose the deeper joy of making undefended, intimate contact with the earth beneath me and the spirit around me. I trust that I am guided.
Today and every day, I love you.
With gratitude and wonder,