This Too We Shall PassOver

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This weekend I committed a crime.

I packed a backpack with water, a bit of food, layers of clothing, a first aid kit, The Tao of Physics, a journal, a flashlight, a camera and a sleeping bag.

I left The Magic Mobile by the side of a dirt road.

I hiked five miles along the seashore, through forest and meadow, to a waterfall cascading into the Pacific Ocean.

As the sun went down and the other humans headed toward their built homes, I stayed.

Clouds descended over me and I entered a portal

These last moments of Pesach (Passover)

of sunlight

of Shabbat

We are at the shores of the sea.

The ego, the attachments, the false identifications…the seductive security of the familiar are chasing us.

The only way we know

is behind us.

Can we really leave it?

We stand at the entrance to the unconscious

Mother Gaia’s birth canal

We know we cannot enter and remain unaltered

We know not where we are going

and in this moment, the way forward looks impossible.

My ancestors stand here together.

I am the only human in sight.

The roar of the ocean drowns my words until

my voice rises

in song

in primal scream

in rebirth of Miriam HaNevi’ah, Achot Aharon

and the women dancing with her

into the waters.

Shouting at the setting sun

discovering the holy vibration

the reverberation

of my voice

throughout my entire being

The silence kills

One who feels the Earth who breathes her

can only take so much

before it must be cast out

released to the crashing waves

to transform, bury, wash clean and heal.

Last fading light

I pray with Her

that the next generation will see wildflowers

that the oceans may be full of life

that the humans may breathe clean air

and drink pure waters

and receive her nourishment

in gratitude and love

That there will always be an opening

for ceremony

and prayer

and song

and healing

that we know ourselves as One

that we Feel ourselves Free

 

I crawl into my sleeping bag and brace my back to the wind of the sea

I place my hands upon my body

willing Reiki to bring me to dreams

nothing comes through

I am gripped by Fear

Everything I have been told about being alone

as a woman

in the “wild”

at night

in the darkness

in the unconscious

All these voices speak now.

Rogues

Rape

Rockslide

Mountain lions

Washed away

Cold

Death.

Alone.

 

I unzip from my cocoon

deep breaths

digging hands in sand

I make myself a home

to be warmed by my own fire

With one more gaze

at so many stars

I find rest

 

Morning comes and first light wakes me

The sun is reaching for me

and the moon smiles in her balance overhead

I am ready to climb

I am stronger than I ever allowed myself to believe

I am capable

I am never alone

I am more than this body

 

This is not the path I took

though among these footsteps

are my own

There is stillness now

quiet enough to taste the aliveness

the first stirrings of every creature’s breath

in praise of the One.

 

I am grateful.

I came to give my grief over to Gaia

and she has restored me

filled me anew with her unconditional love

to share wherever She leads me.

 

I smile as I near where I left The Magic Mobile

Good morning, park ranger

Yes, the Minnesota plates

Ahh.

Thank you for reminding me

that to sleep upon the earth

I must pay for a permit

weeks in advance.

Thank you for reminding me

that this fear of Her

leads us to strive to dominate Her

to confine Her to “National Parks”

and regulate Her,

send her away to far-off lands

so that the people suffering the insanity of our cities

feel their cries bounce off concrete

Thank you for reminding me

that I may lose myself in a moment of fear

of how I will pay your fine

and keep the roof you require

over my head,

how I will earn my right to live and thrive,

and yet I am one of the privileged

who has found access to this place

stolen from those who have lived Her

and loved Her,

the ones she birthed from this soil.

Thank you for reminding me

to presence Her again

and again

and affirm the right of my brothers and sisters

to be in sacred relationship with our Source of Life,

to pray and dream with our bodies to the Earth.

She will always guide those who

Listen

 

Listen…

Our ancestors are here now.

We were there.

Together

we know

how to step into the sea

and trust that when we are about to choke

on our salty tears

the waters will part

We will no longer enslave ourselves

enslaving each other

conquering Her

Can you hear the drums?

We are dancing now

into the waters

of eternity

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One thought on “This Too We Shall PassOver

  1. Nature abhors a vacuum. To empty is to listen to the plea of the mother of all mothers. An audience of faith and trust in return for the wisdom a key to ones heart, an instrument of harmony when played like the wind on a reed on a summers midday. Torus, an example of flow, demonstrates direction as a natural phenomenon when unobstructed trails lead one to one and again to one…

    Brave is she attuned to play her flute in celebration of beauty in life itself.

    Bravo dear lover, rivka willow forever being born. A masterpeace indeed! xo ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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